Written by Rhiannon Frater
If you’ve ever stepped into a leadership role (or even just a high-stakes meeting) and felt an unspoken pressure to act a certain way, you’re not alone.
Maybe you’ve been told to “speak with more authority,” “be more decisive,” or “project confidence” in a way that doesn’t feel natural. Maybe you’ve tried to emulate the leaders around you and wondered why it left you feeling disconnected from yourself.
Few people know this pressure more intimately than Reena Merchant, a global design and leadership expert with over 20 years in the tech industry. She has led teams at Google, YouTube, Sony PlayStation, Citrix, and BlackBerry, and is the founder of OurVoice and creator of the Leadership From Within framework. Her work centers on a mission to expand the definition of leadership so more people can lead effectively, without sacrificing who they are.
Reena has seen firsthand how the modern workplace often rewards a narrow set of leadership traits: charisma without cracks, decisiveness without doubt, and a commanding presence that leaves little room for vulnerability. For some, that style is authentic. For many others, it’s a mask worn out of necessity in environments that have long defined leadership by a single archetype.
The Unspoken Pressure to Perform Leadership
Workplace cultures often create enormous pressure to conform to certain leadership models. Unspoken norms and long-standing beliefs about what a “successful leader” looks like get projected onto new leaders, shaping how they’re evaluated and whether they’re seen as ready for bigger opportunities. For anyone entering a new organization, striving for promotion, or simply trying to maintain their place, the message can be subtle but clear: fit the mold if you want to succeed. And for those whose natural style doesn’t align with what’s traditionally been applauded or validated, it doesn’t always feel safe to lead as themselves.
This creates a quiet but powerful pressure. People start to question whether their own way of leading is enough. The problem isn’t that traditional leadership traits are wrong; it’s that they’ve been treated as the only path to influence.
Reena has lived this tension. Early in her career, she often felt the pull to match the leadership archetype around her. In fast-paced tech environments dominated by assertive personalities, she experimented with being more forceful and guarded, hoping it would help her fit in and get ahead. Instead, she felt a growing dissonance between the person she was and the person she was presenting to the world.
“It’s not that those traits are inherently bad,” she reflects. “But when they’re not authentic to you, they take an emotional toll. You start leading from performance rather than presence.”
Choosing Alignment Over Performance
Reena’s turning point didn’t come from a single dramatic moment, but from a gradual build-up of small realizations over years. She began to notice that when she led from her natural style, measured, empathetic, and deeply attuned to others, something shifted. Teams became more collaborative. People felt safe to share unpolished ideas. Trust deepened.
Her calm demeanor wasn’t a liability; it was a leadership advantage. By creating space for others to contribute, she unlocked innovation and stronger relationships. This was the start of what would become her Leadership From Within philosophy: the belief that the most powerful leadership comes from alignment between who you are and how you lead.
The Leadership From Within Framework
Through her work, Reena has distilled her approach into the Leadership From Within framework, a guide for leaders who want to build impact without abandoning their authenticity. It’s built on three core pillars:
- Discovering Your Identity: Developing a deep awareness of your own values, strengths, and blind spots so you can lead from a place of grounded clarity.
- Courage to Express Yourself: Choosing to show up as yourself, even when the environment rewards a different style, and embracing vulnerability as a leadership strength.
- Leading With Authenticity: Setting boundaries, making aligned decisions, and inspiring others through the trust and connection your authenticity creates.
When leaders strengthen all three pillars, Reena explains, they create a ripple effect. Teams become more innovative, organizations more inclusive, and individuals more engaged.
The Courage to Lead Differently
Even as her leadership grew more effective, the challenges didn’t disappear. At points in her career, she was passed over for opportunities and told she wasn’t “aggressive enough” for certain roles. Less-qualified peers who conformed more closely to traditional executive presence were promoted ahead of her.
In those moments, she leaned harder into her own definition of leadership. She gave herself space to feel the sting of self-doubt but resisted the urge to perform a version of herself that didn’t align with her values. Over time, she saw that courage to remain authentic in the face of pressure was the real prerequisite for impactful leadership.
“When I finally stopped trying to mimic what leadership was ‘supposed’ to look like and trusted my voice instead, everything started to click,” she shares. “The most successful and fulfilling moments of my career have come when I allowed myself to show up fully as I am.”
From Self-Alignment to Collective Impact
As she embraced her authentic style, Reena found her clarity widening beyond her own career. She began to see how the leadership mold limited not only individuals, but entire organizations, stifling innovation, diversity, and belonging.
This realization fueled her to found OurVoice, a community platform dedicated to helping people reconnect with their authenticity and self-expression. Her message is clear: expanding the definition of leadership isn’t just about personal fulfillment. It’s about unlocking more effective, inclusive, and human-centered ways of working that benefit entire teams and companies.
Why This Matters More Than Ever
In today’s workplace, adaptability, empathy, and the ability to inspire trust are more important than ever. Yet these traits are often undervalued because they don’t always match the dominant leadership script.
Reena argues that the future of leadership depends on broadening our collective understanding of what effective leadership looks like. That means creating space for introverts, deep thinkers, quiet visionaries, and anyone whose power doesn’t come from commanding the room, but from transforming it.
“It’s not about rejecting traditional leadership traits,” she explains. “It’s about making room for the full spectrum of strengths so we can tap into the richness and diversity of human potential.”
The Invitation to Lead From Within
Reena’s story offers both a challenge and an invitation. The challenge is to examine where we may be performing leadership rather than embodying it. The invitation is to trust that who you are is not only enough, but needed.
Authentic leadership, as she defines it, is an act of quiet rebellion. It’s the choice to prioritize presence over performance. It’s the willingness to lead in a way that feels congruent, even if it looks different from what’s expected.
“The world doesn’t need more leaders who fit the mold,” she says. “It needs more leaders who are willing to break it.”
So the next time you wonder if you’re too soft, too quiet, or too different to lead, consider Reena’s question:
What would it look like to lead from within?
Because maybe the version of leadership you’ve been searching for isn’t out there at all. It’s already inside you, waiting to be trusted.
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